Starring: Forrest Tucker, Laurence Payne, Jennifer Jayne, Janet Munro, Warren Mitchell. Writers: Peter Key, Jimmy Sangster. Producers: Robert S. Baker, Monty Berman. Director: Quentin Lawrence.
Original air date: November 28, 1989
So it begins. With the opening “Love Theme” for Mystery Science Theater 3000, we launch right into the show, with a film from the late 1950s – “The Crawling Eye” – that actually isn’t terrible. It’s just the monsters – those Crawling Eyes – are a sight to behold. And headless mountain climbers and beautiful, if pointless, psychics always make movies better. Right? Prime example of 1950s monster schlock. Let one of the greatest comedy shows in American history commence.
Since this is the first show, there is a lot for me to cover, so hang on. I don’t think future reviews will be quite this long, but I’m not holding myself to that. If anything, I can sometimes be long winded.
This actually isn’t the premier episode, just the first to debut nationally for the fledgling Comedy Channel, the precursor to today’s Comedy Central. For a cable network desperately needing programs to fill up air time, MST3K was a godsend – a two hour program that could air several times a week and give viewers a break from lame sitcoms and bad standup comedians.
“The Crawling Eye” debuted on Nov. 28, 1988, starting with the song that sets up the premise for the show: hapless janitor Joel Robinson (played by show creator and comedian Joel Hodgson) is shot into space, fated to watch terrible movies and see if he can survive the onslaught. His captors are two scientists from the Gizmonic Institute, Dr. Clayton Forrester (improv comic Trace Beaulieu) and Dr. Laurence “Larry” Erhardt (18-year-old fledgling comic Josh Weinstein). While trapped on the Satellite of Love (SOL) – a joke on the Lou Reed song – Robinson used spare parts found around the ship to create robots to keep him company: the laconic, laid back Tom Servo (puppeted and voiced by Weinstein), the sharp-tongued, snappy Crow T. Robot (played by Beaulieu), the gargantuan, sometimes slow-witted Gypsy (voiced by producer Jim Mallon), and Cambot, who is our lens into the show. This is in keeping with Hodgson’s idea to model the show after the serious science fiction film, “Silent Running.”
To survive the experiments, Robinson, Servo and Crow watch the films together, making fun of them along the way. It’s this ridiculous premise which most resembles the films they made fun of. The sketches on the SOL and with the Mad Scientists are done in a way to let the audience know they’re in on a joke, sometimes a bad one at that. The lengthy theater segments are where the show earned its praise and fans.
Those familiar with MST3K will notice that the first season is unique unto itself. The robots aren’t completely up to the specs they will be in future shows and seasons. The SOL set itself is a little sparse and will undergo a complete overhaul in Season 2. Weinstein was only on the show for the first season, so he can be an unfamiliar character. As was his voicing Servo, which co-producer Kevin Murphy would take over in Season 2.
Starting after the intro and commercial break, we see the dark lair, Deep 13, where the mad scientists prepare for this week’s experiment. In the opening banter between the Mads (as they’re often referred) and Joel, we learn Drs. Forrester and Erhardt have been kicked out of Gizmonic and into the institute’s cave-like basement, where the majority of the show’s run will partly be set.
Also, another aspect we’ll see during Joel’s run on the show is the invention exchange. Hodgson was a prop comic at the beginning of his career, doing well-received performances across the country and appearing on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson and Saturday Night Live. Many of his prop creations, some of which are really clever and funny, appeared through his five seasons.
The first invention exchange is OK. Joel and the bots demonstrate the electric bagpipes, doing a funny version of Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love.” The Mads show off their serum, which causes people not to sweat. It’s pretty uninteresting. But it’s the first show, so I’ll give them a break.
After the invention exchange, it’s time for the dreaded “Movie Sign” and the beginning of the film. Before I get to my review of “The Crawling Eye,” let’s discuss the sketches that break up the movie. They serve as a way to give viewers three breathers from the theater segments, and allow for well-placed commercial breaks. Throughout the history of the show, the sketches were hit or miss. When they were on, they could actually be funnier than some of the theater segments. But in this first season, the crew is just getting the handle on it. The pacing is slow, it’s obvious the actors and puppeteers aren’t quite comfortable with the material, and the jokes fall flat. Still, there are a few moments where the sketches elicit smiles. For instance, in the middle bit, Gypsy, the female bot who runs the “higher functions of the satellite,” uncoils herself. There’s some funny commentary from Crow and Servo and a good intro to Gypsy. Other than that, there’s not much to distinguish here.
The very last sketch is where Joel wraps up the episode. He asks the bots what they liked best and what they liked least about that day’s experiment. This is actually pretty funny, including Gypsy’s answer to everything, her intense crush on Richard Basehart. This comes up again and again on the show and remains funny to me, for whatever reason. The Mads then sign off the show with an “until next time” moment. So that’s the basic format for each episode.
But let’s get to the movie, which is why we’re all here, “The Crawling Eye.” This 1956 British production, called the “The Trollenberg Terror” in England, was actually created as a serial – a film shown in parts before other features in the theater. The idea was to give the audience a short film before the main feature, and to also make sure audiences returned for future films to see what would happen in the serial. In 1958, the film’s producers stretched the serial into a film and released it in the United States under the title “The Crawling Eye.”
The film is a cliché of many monster movies of the era. The plot surrounds United Nations worker Alan Brooks (played by F-Troop’s Forrest Tucker), who travels to the Swiss Alps under the recommendation of his scientist friend, Dr. Crevett (Warren Mitchell). Crevett has discovered a cloud hanging around the summit of a popular mountain, the Trollenberg. The cloud doesn’t move and climbers who encounter it keep losing their heads, literally. (“It took his head right off!” yells one climber. “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” comments Servo). It’s the same thing that happened a number of years ago in the Andes, which Brooks and Crevett also investigated.
Along the way, Brooks encounters an overly intense “newspaperman” (Laurence Payne), and two sisters who work as a traveling mind-reading act. One of the sisters, the clairvoyant one, is played by Janet Munro. Her addition is meant to add mystery to movie, but it goes nowhere.
Heads roll throughout the film as the cloud descends the Alps and attacks the main characters. Some people turn into murderous zombies when they encounter the cloud, which is, typically, not explained at all. In the end, all must take refuge in a science observatory high on the mountain where the creatures of the cloud, the crawling eyes, attack. These puppets, with their brain-like appearance, milky eyeball and big tentacles, are hilarious looking. It’s not hard to imagine audiences laughing at the ridiculousness when the movie premiered. You don’t see the creatures until three-quarters of the way into it, and the suspense is broken by the hilarity of the monsters. But hey, the producers worked with what they got.
The movie really isn’t that bad and one I could probably watch on its own. The last moments with the battle of the eyes is pretty well-done, considering what they’re working with. Everyone takes themselves so seriously in their roles, though, which makes it unintentionally hilarious on its own. Big and tall Forrest Tucker (“Good name, bad actor,” says Dr. Forrester) is pretty self-serving in his starring role. Joel and the bots throw many jokes and insults his way, especially comments concerning F-Troop, in which Tucker played Sgt. O’Rourke in the lame comedy-Western sitcom. This movie is also one of the first larger roles for Janet Munro, better known for her Disney Films “Swiss Family Robinson” and “Darby O’Gill and the Little People.” As a kid who grew up watching both these movies over and over again, Munro was one of my first on-screen loves. Hell, she made Sean Connery break out into song in “Darby O’Gill,” and he never did that ever again! And the James MacArthur-Tommy Kirk fight over the girl in “Swiss Family” was one of the few scenes in the film that seemed realistic. A hopeless alcoholic, Munro died at age 38. Saddening, because she was not a terrible actress by any stretch.
As for jokes about the film by Joel and the bots, it’s pretty sparse. Unlike future episodes, there are long pauses throughout the movie where our three friends just sit and watch without saying anything. Many of the jokes are just obvious comments and some aren’t funny. And there are so many missed opportunities. One wishes they had a chance to do some of these movies over again.
To be fair, this is the first show they ever scripted. When they did the show for the Minneapolis station KTMA, it was all improvised. In many cases, it was the first time ever Hodgson, Beaulieu and Weinstein saw the movie. In their 21 episodes for the TV station (many of them Japanese monster movies and bad cop dramas), they realized they needed a little more professionalism and attention to the films. So Hodgson, Beaulieu, Weinstein, producer Jim Mallon, co-producer Kevin Murphy, and local comedian Mike Nelson wrote actual scripts. Needless to say, they got better at it.
That’s not to say there aren’t funny moments. The last half-hour, when the crawling eyes show up, there are some great one-liners that had me laughing out loud. They go on a pun rampage dealing with eyes and sight and winking, which starts really strong, but kind overstays its welcome. Even Joel yells for the bots to “Shut Up!”
Other notable moments include Crow speaking longingly of Munro’s psychic: “She could eat corn-on-the-cob through a picket fence.” Or when Joel tries to figure out how the monsters actually rip off heads: “What's a giant eye going to do, pick you up and wink you to death?” One of my favorite scenes is when a newly-zombied climber returns to the climbing lodge and tries to pour himself a drink and smoke a cigarette. It’s hilariously overacted as the guy misses the glass with the bottle and nearly burns his face with the lighter. Joel goes to town with the scene: “What are they going to do next, have him drive a forklift?” The scene where the sisters demonstrate their mind-reading act is also quite humorous thanks to the comments from our friends.
Overall, a promising start. The show has miles to go before it takes off (Season 3, to be exact), but the seeds are there. The show must now grow.
Rating **
Side note: I’m going to try to rate all reviews on a 4-star basis for all reviews.
Side note part 2: This episode is actually available on DVD, through Shout! Factory’s “MST3K Vol. XVII.”
Side note part 3: I’ll be reviewing other films, music and shows, too. I promise.
Side note part 4: I’ll ease off on the side notes. Hopefully.
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